Thursday, December 13, 2007

The Return of Poppy

The race to be the Republican Party's presidential nominee is in a state of extreme flux. Once-upon-a-time presumptive front-runner John McCain has been suffering from anemic fundraising all year. Former White-Knight-to-the-rescue Freddy "Grandpa Fred" Thompson is literally asleep at the switch. Rudy Giuliani is being dragged down by the Sex on the City scandal. Mitt Romney is desperately trying to avoid being cast out by the GOP's fundies. Mike Huckabee's sudden burst of popularity has got the GOP establishment training its big guns on him. All of this is a reflection of the fact that the Republican rank-and-file isn't particularly happy with any of their candidates.

If this breaks just the right way, we could have every political reporter's fondest dream: a brokered convention. The shakers and movers of the GOP retire into the proverbial smoke-filled room. Assume that all of the leading declared candidates refuse to back down, and the Republicans have to choose a compromise candidate. Who would it be?

The most important clue is the oft-repeated observation, "I'll say this for Dubya -- he makes you realize what a good president his dad was." This, I think, is the sentiment that will rule the hour in Minneapolis. The Republicans will realize that, yeah, Poppy did do pretty well. And if you want an experienced man in the oval office, who better than someone who actually held the job for four years? And anyone who expresses concern about Poppy being in his 80s can be reminded of his skydiving hobby. You can't get more vigorous than that. And if the Republicans do decide to pick #41, who would he pick for his running mate? Who else but good ol' Dan Quayle? And the campaign slogan practically writes itself: PARTY LIKE IT'S 1988!

Yeah, I know, go ahead and laugh. But you'll all be bowing down and worshipping my brilliant prognostication skills when the Republicans emerge from Minneapolis with their Bush/Quayle '08 campaign paraphernalia.

2 comments:

Jennifer Briney said...

Hey Johnny,

Sorry to leave this comment on an unrelated thread but I wanted to give you a heads up on some exciting news. As you may or may not know, the impeachment of Dick Cheney has passed the House and is waiting for action in the House Judiciary Commitee. Robert Wexler, a member of the judiciary committee, is now calling for hearings to begin. He is asking for 50,000 signatures on the petition he has set up at www.wexlerwantshearings.com. On that site, you can also find a you-tube video he filmed and an op-ed he co-wrote with two other members of the judiciary committee in support of hearings.

Please let your readers know about the petition. We can actually help save our country today!

Wexler also wrote a blog at The Huffington Post today if you'd like to check that out too.

Spread the word!

Jen

Anonymous said...

I went on record very early this year (Feb or March), on a few blog comment threads, that I predicted the 2008 race would be Edwards vs. Gingrich.

When Gingrich decided not to run, and the media inexplicably (?) decided to make Edwards the goat and do the Celebrity President coverage on Obama and Clinton, I admitted my prediction was off.

But with Edwards gaining in Iowa, and the possibility of a brokered convention.....I may prove to have powers of great prescience.