Some Democrats are worried that the GOP Has Something on Barack Obama, and that a week before the election they'll drop a bombshell that will destroy Obama's electability. And it turns out they're right. By means of sources I am not at liberty to reveal, I have obtained a report from GOP oppo researchers listing the top ten skeletons in Obama's closet. Expect to see one or more of these revealed on Matt Drudge's website in late October:
10. Barack Obama's real parents are Louis Farrakhan and Jane Fonda.
9. Barack Obama is the Unabomber.
8. Barack Obama cut off John Wayne Bobbitt's penis.
7. During the Nevada caucuses, Barack Obama killed a man in Reno just to watch him die.
6. Barack Obama sank the Titanic AND the Lusitania.
5. Barack Obama assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand.
4. Barack Obama invented crack cocaine.
3. Barack Obama causes lung cancer.
2. Barack Obama murdered Vince Foster.
And the number one skeleton in Barack Obama's closet:
1. Barack Obama is actually black!