Sunday, May 30, 2010

Speak friend and enter

The GOP's latest online trainwreck, America Speaking Out, has been the talk of the left blogosphere. PZ Meyers put it best when he wrote, "Teabaggers are raving, liberal saboteurs are inserting all kinds of crazy suggestions, and you can't tell them apart."

Some choice items from the Health Care category:

Why hasn't anyone followed up on Sarah Palin's idea that we should have Death Panels to decide who gets medical care? I read about her Death Panesl suggestion and thought it was very constructive and would make most of the recent very expensive health care plan unnessicary. The congress ignoring Sarah Palin's Death Panel idea shows that they were not serious about listening to the American People and their Constructive Ideas.

We must institute a health care policy based on the Constitution, as originally intended by the founders. Only those with means to do so should be able to afford leeches to treat their smallpox. Those who can't afford health care should have ten or more children, managing the risk of disease the way God intended.

Soylent green! It will solve both the high cost of health care and create a new food source.

Real Americans pay for their own organ transplants, in cash, and without complaining. Why is it the nanny state government's job to help you when it's YOUR kid who was born with the heart defect?

The government needs to keep it hands off my Medicare and its fingers out of private business. They need to keep their eye on the ball and an ear to the ground. They need to get their head out of the clouds and put their noses to the grindstone. Then, keeping their knees bent and their arms spread. . . gently. . . exhale. . .

All health care laws should be REMOVED from constituton! The goverment should give every U.S citezen a first aid kit and an instruction book on curing diseases. If you get sick it is your responsibilty to cure yourself!

When you buy the boxes of mixed bandaids, they never have enough round bandaids in them. Fix that please.

Now Obama is hot on health care He’s made it his personal affair National Socialist’s the country will be As he goosed-steped all over the Constitution, said he ‘cause you see, the misery I bring, you must all just grin and bare

We should recycle all the corpses of under privelaged children into tires for republican aircraft. Grab your Bags.It's On!

We should just do away with government entirely, that way it is not interfering in ANY of my business. God created us in the "state of nature," where it's every man for himself. We can do without govt.

Bactine. Have you used it? It has lidocaine now. It was great when I was a kid, but now? It's like serious healthcare in a convenient spray bottle.

Kidnap doctors from other countries, classify them as enemy combatants, then force them to work at hospital-prisons (not hospitals in prison, hospitals that are prison) until Americans are immortal, the way God intended.

We should use the elderly as biomass to generate more energy for our military industrial complex. Those smart bombs aren't going to build themselves.

Repeal certain aspects of health care reform, and insert a provision that expands the death panel concept to include other species, and all that. We spend too much money on caring for do-nothing, worthless dogs and cats who want nothing but a free ride.

There is a person from Texas who could really help us out. Her name is Claire Bennet and she has a can heal herself. Like if she gets a cut it just heals right up, lickity split! But the great thing is that if you use her blood in a transfusion the blood will heal other people too! Once, her dad was hit in the face with a bullet and it ended his life. He was a goner, 100% Jesus bound, but she used her blood and his gray and lifeless body became vibrant once more!

Hugs from Xenu and Kitten tears are cures for all flavors of diseases.

The last comment is a relic from a flood of Xenu-related ideas that were posted to the site on Thursday and Friday. Sadly, the site admins recently deleted all ideas that carried the Xenu tag.

1 comment:

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Poe's Law needs to be expanded in scope- it's not just for creationists anymore.